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Funeral Thank-You Note Wording

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Suggested wording for funeral thank-you notes

Writing thank-you notes after a funeral may be done by an individual or divided among family members. It's okay to ask a close friend for help writing and mailing funeral thank-you notes and acknowledging expressions of sympathy at and after a funeral.

If you are not sure what to write in a funeral thank you note, below are examples of funeral and sympathy thank-you note wording. Click here for funeral-thank-you note etiquette tips and advice from The Emily Post Institute®.


To clergy, spiritual counselor.

A brief note to the celebrant, clergy or spiritual counselor can convey your appreciation for their comforting words and help.

Dear Reverend Jones,

Thank you for your spiritual counsel and services at the funeral of my mother. Especially at times like these, your guidance is so appreciated.

Mary Peters

To pallbearer

Dear Frank,

Thank you for serving as a pallbearer. You are a true friend. Your contributions to the service were a tremendous help. I appreciate your kindness.


For attending the funeral or visitation

It is not necessary to send a thank-you to everyone who attended the funeral or visitation. But if you would like to acknowledge someone, a simple thank-you note would be appreciated.

Dear Mr. and Mrs. Chan,

It was really nice to see you at my mother's funeral. I really appreciate the effort you made to travel such a distance. I was grateful to hear your memories, and your support made a difference to me and my family.


For flowers and memorial contributions

A thank-you note is sent to each person who sends flowers or a memorial contribution. If the flowers or contribution is from a group, send the note to the leader of the group.

Dear Mrs. Lopez,

Thank you for the beautiful pink arrangement of flowers. Roses were Mom's favorite and they served as a reminder of the special friend you were to her/ how much you and the others meant to her.

Sincerely, Mary

To relatives and special friends

If relatives and special friends send floral arrangements, a memorial contribution, food or assist in other ways, a thank-you note is an appropriate way to show your appreciation.

Dear Penny and Joe,

I want to thank you for the wonderful meal you delivered to our home after the funeral. It was delicious and such a thoughtful gesture. My mother really valued your friendship. Your kindness is greatly appreciated.


To co-workers

If a co-worker extends him or herself, it is appropriate to thank that person with a handwritten note.

Dear Richard,

I appreciate your stepping in and covering my work during this difficult time. Thank you for your support. It will make it easier when I return to the office next week.


For sympathy cards and letters

If you receive a sympathy card, it is appropriate to send an acknowledgement card. If a personal note was included in the sympathy card, a brief note should be written inside the thank-you card. If you receive a longer sympathy letter, that should be acknowledged with a personal reply.

Dear Jason,

It was so thoughtful of you to remember us at this time. Thank you for taking the time to share your memories of Mom with us. Your words were such a comfort. Friends like you have helped us get through this difficult time.


For email

If you receive a sympathy email, although optional you may reply by email or a handwritten note.

Dear George,

Thank you for sending your words of sympathy. It was kind of you to show you care.



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Emily Post's Etiquette, 18th Edition
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